Sam Walton would turn over in his grave

For real? Sam would be, hell is turning over in his grave.  I ain't NEVER been to no Wal Mart like this.  What in the hell is this guy rapping about? "She in da lingerie section. She in da lingerie section."  Just goes to show you can write a rap song about ANYTHING these days.  Hmmm that gets me to thinking.  Maybe I'll write a rap song about going to Subway and call it "$5 Footlong Hos"

Rap shows schwrap shows

A free concert?  Hell yeah I'll go even if it's a band that I marginally like.  Tonight Del the Funky Homosapien played at New Earth Music Hall and I love him. He has one of the most unique and twisted voices and minds in hip hop.  For those who can't place his voice he provides the rap on the Gorillaz's track "Clint Eastwood", arguably their most iconic song.  I remember Del from his first single, "Mistadoblina" that dropped in 1991 back when rap/hip hop music was still good.  I wanted to get some pics as well and see what his show was about.
As I was leaving, early BTW, I ran into my brother who asked why I was leaving. I told him, "Aren't all rap shows the same?" He answered, "No!"  In my opinion they are.  You seem to get the same spill = bass so loud you can't make out any music, the stage setup is the same with the front man, a hype man, and a DJ with his turntables set up on a fellowship hall table in the back, you can't understand any of the lyrics the rapper is spitting, and there are simply no highs and lows like you get in a rock concert.  When you go see a band you get emotion, slow songa fast songs, interaction with band mates, and technical flubs.  At a rap show the only technical flub you may get is that the Ipod or pre recorded track on the laptop might not que up in the same time.  I wish I had seen Jay-Z on his tour because I am sure that was a real concert as he had a real band backing him and actually put on a concert.  Anyways I was bored tonight.  I stayed to get a few pics but that was about it.  The draw of hip hop is the flow of the rhymes and the genius of word play. When you can't here those nuances that make this art form what it is what are you there for?

Token Whitey

In the 80's once whitey started accepting rap and by accepting I mean they realized, "H-O-L-Y S-H-I-T! There is an ass load of money to be made off these clowns and their fad music.", they started force feeding it everywhere. In this apparent after school special you see future stars such as the guy that played Malcom X, the sidekick from "The Last Dragon", Dwayne Wayne, and the black guy from Grey's Anatomy that got real pissed off, rapping to us about injustice and how "We can't stop, won't stop."

Goddammit. Ya'll done made me go and kick this muthafuckin' dorr.

Does this show you that he means business? No? Well maybe it means that I'm ready to kick the door back open on this muthafuckin' blog yo. I've been gone a while but I think it's time to make this buffet, robust again.

Kanye is a gay fish

I am not posting this to hate on Kanye because I love Kanye. I like his music, I like his bravado, but I don't like that weird ass looking girl that he has been running with. She reminds of the new millennium's Grace Jones. Nonetheless as much as I love him he does need to get a handle on his ego. It appears this last week's South Park as made him take a step back and look at his grand ego. Here is a recap of the episode. Pretty funny if I must say so.

{CLICK THE HEADLINE TO SEE THE VIDEO}

beating up hookers and butchering a foreign language

So Sham-WOW Vince, who is trying to take down the Church or Scientology with profits from his wonder sponge, has found a new market - the Spanish. In an effort to reach more people and rake in more sales Vince is pushing sales in the Latin market of his miracle soaker upper. The thing is that he sounds like a complete douche speaking Spanish. "Es muy terrible'! No es bueno senor Sham-WOW!" I guess he too felt that it was so bad that after filming it he went out, found a hooker, and smacked her ass around. My guys down at the precinct say that Vince apparently tried to soak up her blood with his Sham-WOW...didn't work too well.

The Boys are Back In Town

Well as most everyone who is anyone knows Phish reunited this weekend. FUCK I wish I was there!!!! However the weekend did not go off without a hitch. A few years ago and I might have been one of these numbers spending a night in the Hampton jail. Yes readers despite my good nature appearance the Buffet has been a couple of nights in county lock up due to having too much fun a Phish...or two. I have listened to the shows and though they didn't seem quite as experimental as I, and a lot of people, would have liked them to be they sound GREAT! It is really shitty for us fans to really expect them to play the style that they did over 10 years ago - this spaced out funk groove that so many people fell in love with - I know I did. None the less they are back for this year. Though I won't be able to see them on THEIR shows this summer I will be catching them at Bonarroo which I suspect will be a pretty impressive and special show.

This band was my life in my 20s. I traveled all around to see them and they introduced me to SO much and SO many. There were so many great times had at their shows. It was about the music but in a bigger sense it wasn't. Their music provided an escape to far away places in your mind and when it was over and you had to return to work you, well I was lost for a few days. Everybody has something in their young adult days they hold onto and they feel is theirs and well Phish, like a lot of people, was mine and will always be.